So yesterday I was super tired so I didn't write the "week recap" post. Žiga and I went hiking with some friends, and we got up super early, to catch the morning mountain vibe. But enough of that for now - let me tell you about my week.
Training was hard, as every beginning is. I've been working on my cardio a lot, so I'll be able to take longer training sessions. Speaking of; this week my focus were abs and legs. Carmen made a really good gym plan for me, because she's absent for a couple of days now - she made sure I do my workouts though! But the really hard part for me is food. I just can't get the amounts right :/ I know I'm being too hard on myself, but I just really want this to work. I need to discipline myself more, and stay focused. I'm sure this week will be better, and I will make progress.
THIS WEEK'S FAVORITES
As you might have read on my FB page, I'm taking the next step towards full recovery. I've had some health issues for a long time now, but in the past two years they got completely out of control. I'm not quite ready to share the full story (I hope someday I will be), but here's a quick recap. I was always a happy, healthy girl, but when I hit puberty, my body just didn't listen to my mind any longer. So among other issues I started having severe stomach problems. And because I'm me, I ignored them for as long as possible - and that was until about two years ago. But before that, because of my ignorance, I gained a lot of weight (at 159cm I weighed 59.5kg), so I decided to do something about that in a healthy way. I began training regularly, and did my best to eat healthy and sleep a lot. And when I lost almost 10kg, my body (despite my effort to be healthy) just wouldn't cooperate any longer. I started feeling sick almost every night, and because of that, at first, I stopped eating in the evening. The night sickness got better for a while, but it obviously wasn't the right call. Soon I stopped eating after 3pm, later it got so extreme that my last meal was at 12pm. That was before Christmas 2015.
That was (at least I think so) a breaking point for me - I've accepted my health problems as a part of my life and no longer wanted to fight them. So that's when the physical collapse began. Before I realized how badly out of control things got, I was weighing 40.3kg. I was at risk of organ failure, had severe anemia, and my energy levels were so low I couldn't do any of the regular daily chores. And that's when it hit me. I'm going to die unless I do something about this. And with the help of my loving family and friends, I did. After numerous medical exams, tons of medicine, but most important, a positive mind, I managed to push myself to eat later and later each day. Now my last meal is at 4:30pm, and I feel great! I know I still have a long way to go, but I am determined and motivated to make it. So that's what brings me to writing this post.
Last week I sat down with a personal trainer, Carmen Kralj. I told her about my problems, and also introduced her to the goals i've set for myself. She is amazing - immediately she said she's happy to help, which gave me even more hope and belief that I really am going to get out of this.
Now here are some pictures to help you visualize what happened to my body through the last couple of years.
And this is me now. The photo was taken the day of my first gym session with Carmen (12. 10. 2016). My weight is balancing around a healthy 44kg, and I'm feeling a lot better!
But as you can imagine, my energy levels during the last couple of wears were close to zero - so I couldn't exercise as much as I wanted to. I gained a lot of fat, and lost a lot of muscle, so now I've decided to turn things around! And this is where Carmen does her magic. We'll be training at the Alfa Gym fitness studio two to three times a week, and there'll be a progress update post on my blog every Sunday. In the mean time you can follow my Instagram story, where you'll be able to track my daily workouts, meals, etc.
For the next three months we'll have 28 training sessions. Usually on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, and we'll document my progress weekly. C said I will probably see some results after the first month already! She also gave me a meal plan, and some advice on how to get healthier in general.
So my primary goal is to gain some muscle weight, and define my body. She will not only help me with the gym part, but as well my meal plan.
You can expect 12 blog posts until 6. 1. 2017, and then we'll see how things turn out. There will definitely be a lot on IG posts about my progress also, and in the weekly blog updates you'll be able to find my favorite meals and exercises of the week!
I'm so excited about the next few months - my motivation has never been so strong, and now I know I can do this! I am inviting you to join me on my journey, Probably it won't all be hearts and flowers, but some tears, too. But I will not let that stop me, not after all I've been through. Not after all the support I got from my family and friends, and from you guys! Thank you so much for that, it really means the world to me.
I will find balance, and I'm sure so will you. If you're struggling with anything yourself, please message me, and I'll try to help.
Here's to a new chapter in my life! May it be filled with happiness, health, acceptance, and most of all, love.